Good morning, fellow founder! 👋

If you missed our last issue, you can still read it at the link below! 👇

Today's edition is a little different:

Like many of you, the FounderForge team is taking a break to reflect on the year and simply spend some time with loved ones.

So this issue is not filled with the usual content but instead comes with a little story.

The story is a quirky reflection of the major startup events of 2023 wrapped in a not-so-unbelievable startup story.

If you are wondering why the style is totally different than usual - yes, this time we had some help from our friend ChatGPT. 🙈

So don't take it too seriously and allow yourself a laugh! 🙌 

🧚 The Legendary Tale of Sam Evergreen

In the land of startups and silicon, young Sam Evergreen embarked on a quest most grand. His idea? An app named "Treeasy," where users could plant virtual trees with a swipe. "Real trees? Pfft, they're so last century!" he proclaimed. Sam's pitch was so captivating that investors threw money at him like confetti at a New Year's party. With a hefty $100 million in the bank, Sam was ready to make the world a greener place, one virtual tree at a time.

But 2023 was a year of twists and turns in Startupland. First, the FTX debacle unraveled, sending shockwaves through the tech world. Sam, in a stroke of genius, decided to integrate a "TreeCoin" into Treeasy, promising it was more stable than any crypto – "Backed by virtual trees!" he declared. Investors raised eyebrows but kept their wallets wide open.

Then came the Silicon Valley Bank bankruptcy. Sam, ever the optimist, pitched a new feature in Treeasy – "Bank a Tree." It was a virtual savings account, but instead of interest, you got more virtual trees. "It's foolproof!" he assured his worried investors, who were now sweating profusely.

WeWork was next to fall. Sam, a former tenant and avid water-cooler conversationalist, decided to pivot. "Co-treeing spaces!" he announced. "Like co-working, but for virtual tree enthusiasts!" The idea baffled everyone, especially the investors who were now googling "How to un-invest."

OpenAI had been a hot topic all year, and Sam saw an opportunity. He introduced AI-generated trees that users could talk to. "They'll give you life advice!" Sam pitched. The trees, however, only gave tips on how to photosynthesize, which, while informative, wasn't particularly helpful to humans.

As Coinpanion and Altify merged, Sam had an epiphany. "What if Treeasy also merges... with itself?" He called it "Self-merger," a concept so revolutionary that it made absolutely no sense.

Then there was Brickwise's new CEO, Valentin. Sam, inspired, declared himself the new CEO of Treeasy. "But you're already the CEO," his team pointed out. "Ah, but not like Valentin!" Sam said, adjusting imaginary spectacles.

OnlyFans hitting 5.6 billion in revenue gave Sam another brilliant idea. "TreeFans!" he exclaimed. "For exclusive tree content!" It was unclear what this content would entail, but Sam was sure it was the next big thing.

Loom's sale for 1.5 billion made Sam dizzy with ambition. "We'll sell Treeasy for twice that!" he declared. "To whom?" asked his increasingly concerned team. "To the TreeCoin holders, of course! They buy anything!" Sam replied, now fully detached from reality.

By Christmas, Sam's wild ride in the startup world was legendary. Treeasy had no real trees, a self-merger strategy, AI tree therapists, and an exclusive tree fan club. Investors were baffled, the team was bewildered, but Sam? He was blissfully planting virtual trees, convinced he would be the next Elon Musk.

As the startup ecosystem moved on, Sam, glimpsing the collapse of his virtual forest, pivoted again - this time, to the other side of the table as a venture capitalist.

In his new role, Sam promised to sprinkle the seeds of wisdom and "value-add" to his portfolio companies. However, shortly after his foray into venture capitalism, Sam embarked on a winter vacation in Switzerland, a trip that seemed to stretch like a long, unending winter.

As months turned into years, the startups in Sam's portfolio continued to receive his "Out of Office" emails, each one assuring his imminent return and brimming with promises of value addition. The subject line, "Adding Value from the Alps," became a running joke among startup founders.

The legend of Sam Evergreen, the VC who turned year-long Swiss holidays into an art form, began to circulate in Silicon Valley. Startup founders whispered tales of receiving automated wisdom from the absentee VC, whose advice was as elusive as a yeti in the Swiss Alps.

😂 Meme of the Fortnight

The year 2023 in a nutshell.

🤔 Your Input for 2024

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That is all for this year!

We hope you can enjoy some time off with your loved ones and get rested so you can tackle 2024 head-on. 🚀

See you in 2024! ✌️

Happy holidays,
Alex, Florian and Valentin! 👋